I’ll let the tears slip from the corners of my eyes
Today, on these concrete grounds like rain
Sit in the playground, close to the trampoline
To be finally seen by everyone and everything
Let my vulnerability run deep like a river
This time I’ll betray myself to tell you
Rotten crowd with hungry eyes, Qui Vive
They’ll photograph me in their minds now
They’ll whisper “something’s behind curtains”
They’ll Haunt for reasons in the ways I blink
All-embracing definitions across the board
I hope they don’t find them too soon
Hurtful now, living in the veins of my sobriety
So we beat on, bodies against each other
Ceaselessly into not welcoming the past again
But how does a beat up body pick up itself ?
Bruised. Scared with regrets in the Mugo pine
First time, I lost it to you, afterwards I smiled
I spit your kiss in the sink, like to say fuck you
Scrubbed my body so hard and held on affinity
Genuflected and prayed, suffocated in what I did
Your face smiled, says it knew it found a toy
We played Rumi on sheets covered in blood
Applied ointment on my skin like a canvas
Like a rusted bicycle wheel to galvanize it again
Your eyes told me you didn’t feel a thing
I showed you myself and you denied it all
You see I lost it all to you, the second year
Naivety, I agree, I subscribed to it all with “ok
So I hid behind colors and words
The clock strikes and you dressed me in your music
To dance to the silence between my thighs
You said “I’ll make you happy, you’ll see”
By now you know your lips played a lie
And this time my goodbye means
Forever to never see you again.
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